Waiting

I’m feeling rather relieved that the waiting is finally almost over for me. Tomorrow afternoon I get to find out which direction my life is going to take for the future. My shadow will be revealed for exactly what it is at last.

Over the past weeks I’ve had many varied emotions, but lately I’ve been feeling in quite a positive mood. I will accept whatever the verdict is and move on in the direction I need to go.
Last week I went into hospital to have the biopsy and what a fun time that was — not!! I found that being on the other side of the fence is not much fun and mostly I think that is because you lose all control. You just have to do what you are told even if you don’t feel like it.
So I presented at the allotted time, and then I was taken through to change into a hospital gown and then had the usual blood pressure and so on done. The Radiologist came and did the consent, running through the list of complications and their percentages and so forth.
Finally I was taken in to the CT room and readied for the biopsy itself. The whole procedure took around forty-five minutes and it wasn’t the most fun way to spend my time. Then I had a chest x-ray and was sent to the ward. A couple of hours later I was transported back to have another chest x-ray to make sure I didn’t have a slow air leak or pneumothorax. Unfortunately I did although I was assured it was only small one. But it also meant another night in hospital. Not exactly the Hilton but the care was good.
Coming home on Friday was awesome — back to familiar surroundings and my own bed and most importantly good food. I guess too I’ve been fortunate to have the Commonwealth Games on to watch on telly, amongst other things I’ve done to occupy my time of waiting.
A week is a long time when you are waiting for the axe to fall, although I really can’t complain as I’ve had lots of well wishes, books to read and crochet to do. I was doing really well with my crochet until I gave myself a tendonitis. So that put an end to my craft work.

Amongst all this, has been lots of thinking time. Being forced to slow down and not do much can result in serious reflection. It has made me realise the truth in the thought that we should all live one day at a time and as if it was our last. Sage advice.
Summing-up, I have much to be grateful for and probably one of the most important items is my shadow, for that has opened my eyes to what really is around me.