Spring has been with us for almost a month now and it is just now giving us some lovely sunshine to enjoy. The sort of weather that makes you feel like getting outside and doing things — even the cat has ventured out of the house.
I have a number of hanging baskets some of which need replenishing with new plants. My intention is to do that over the next few weeks. One of these baskets is looking very rough — the coir is sticking out at odd angles as though someone has been pulling at it. It was a puzzle but I think the reason is clear now. Sitting in the sunshine enjoying a cuppa this morning, I noticed a bird busy on one of the baskets. At first, I thought it was looking for food and then it started pulling at the coir basket — so I’m guessing that a few nests are being built at present.
The birds take advantage of the moment and utilise whatever they can find to build their nests. They get on with the job — no whinging or whining — just move on. We, humans, tend to wallow a bit, feel sorry for ourselves. We dwell on the past and sometimes have difficulty moving on. Grief can be like that where we might feel that moving on is like forgetting. There can be a fear that if we get on with our lives — laugh and have fun — then others may think us shallow or uncaring.
But the flip side is that we must move forward. Life doesn’t let us stay stuck with our memories, because there is constant change around us. The world keeps moving forward and so must we — in varying degrees.
Even after twenty-one years I still feel grief for the loss of Kelly, but it is a different kind compared with that of those first weeks. It has mellowed and just because I am living life, laughing, and enjoying myself it doesn’t mean I have forgotten her. On the contrary, I am reminded of her every day in many different ways. And now I can smile when I think of her and not shed a tear every time. It means I can enjoy watching the growth of my newest grandchild with pleasure, even as I think how much she would have loved him.
Spring is a time of renewal, a time to celebrate the end of a seemingly long winter and the promise of sunny summer days ahead. Enjoy the transition.